New Times,
New Thinking.

  1. World
  2. UK
26 January 2022

This England: Cheesed off

This column – which, though named after a line in Shakespeare’s “Richard II”, refers to the whole of Britain – has run in the NS since 1934.

By New Statesman

Cheesed off

A Dairylea video-on-demand commercial showing two girls hanging upside down while one eats a cheese triangle has been banned following complaints by 14 viewers alleging unsafe behaviour.

The Advertising Standards Authority, which investigated, said it found eating upside down “could be dangerous for children to emulate”.
Metro (Jenny Woodhouse)

[See also: This England: Attack of the clones]

Feet for a king

A pair of feet seen sticking out of a rolled-up carpet in a car prompted a call to police. But when Cambridgeshire Police tracked it down, they found not a body but a mannequin dressed as Prince Charming.

The force said officers were called by a member of the public who spotted the concerning sight on the M11 motorway at lunchtime on Saturday 15 January.

Give a gift subscription to the New Statesman this Christmas from just £49

Police said: “Advice was given to the driver to avoid such circumstances occurring again.” They added the mannequin was being taken to a themed birthday party.
BBC East of England
(Daragh Brady)

[See also: This England: Once in a blue moon]

Cat call

A cat missing for eight months has been reunited with its owner after she recognised his meow over the telephone while on a call to her vet.

Rachael Lawrence, from Braintree, Essex, was talking to the vet about her other cat when she heard Barnaby’s cry in the background. She was told it was a stray but phoned back later and asked for details of the cat as “it was bugging me”, she said. Barnaby is now back with his family.
BBC Essex (Catherine Dyer)

Each printed entry receives a £5 book token. Entries to comp@newstatesman.co.uk or on a postcard to This England.

Content from our partners
Building Britain’s water security
How to solve the teaching crisis
Pitching in to support grassroots football

This article appears in the 26 Jan 2022 issue of the New Statesman, The Light that Failed