We passed the point in the EU referendum campaign where this mole could tell real life and The Thick of It spoofs apart a long time ago. This one is real: Nigel Farage has recruited about 35 fishing boats and they are sailing up the Thames to make the case for Brexit.
No really, they are.
This is the Brexit boat that Nigel Farage will be sailing down the Thames. Note patriotic balloons and deckchairs pic.twitter.com/3KmidxzTsR
— Michael Deacon (@MichaelPDeacon) June 15, 2016
We’ve known for years that Ukip want to return Britain to some fictional version of the past where there were no immigrants, everything was covered in Union Jack bunting at all times and passports were slightly larger than they are now, but this mole didn’t realise they also wanted Britain to rule the waves once more.
Just to make the whole thing feel even more like a fake headline from The Day Today, Sir Bob Geldof has hired his own boat and is attempting to drown out Farage’s fishermen with ad-libbed pro-Remain slogans.
Bob Geldof pulls up alongside HMS Farage and shouts, “FARAGE, YOU’RE A FRAUD! YOU’RE NO FISHERMAN’S FRIEND!” pic.twitter.com/TwtQqcCc6V
— Michael Deacon (@MichaelPDeacon) June 15, 2016
Apparently it got a bit fighty at one point, with a hose deployed.
SHOTS FIRED! A Leave vessel just hit Remain supporters with a hose
— Mikey Smith (@mikeysmith) June 15, 2016
Sadly, nobody is dressed as a pirate, although Scottish Ukip MEP David Coburn has apparently scrubbed up specially for the occasion.
Captain Coburn is here: “I’ve had a bath special” #battleofthethames pic.twitter.com/4KKhTfUEQF
— John Stevens (@johnestevens) June 15, 2016
The flotilla is aiming to be outside Parliament during PMQs. So far, it seems to be a score draw as to who has triumphed in what is being called “The Battle of the Thames”.
General consensus is Farage has more boats, but Sir Bob has a better sound system. pic.twitter.com/ILjTpUuSKJ
— Mikey Smith (@mikeysmith) June 15, 2016
But sadly, there has been no answer as yet to the biggest question of the day:
Where is Boaty McBoatface in all this, that’s what I’d like to know… #battleofthethames
— Jen, Biter of People (@JenBitesPeople) June 15, 2016
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