Against all wisdom, your mole tuned into sinister televised pantomime Question Time last night – the politics nerd equivalent of nineties ITV gameshow Gladiators – and was of course immediately rewarded for that masochistic impulse.
For there he was. The inevitable boorish elderly double-barrelled plum – an actor from popular elf romp Lord of the Rings, or something – yelling and banging the desk uncontrollably at the audacity of a woman voicing her opinion.
When Green MP and global representative of patiently amused women everywhere Caroline Lucas dared state that Donald Trump lost the popular vote in 2016’s US presidential election, John Rhys-Davies exploded.
“OH, WOMAN!” he screamed hysterically, slamming his hands down in front of him. “DO YOU NOT? HAVE YOU EVER READ KENNETH HARROW [sic – it’s actually “Arrow”, but never mind, he was emotional] AND ARROW’S THEOREM?!”
To which Lucas smiled the universally-recognised smile for
“ANY SYSTEM, HAS, OF ELECTION, HAS ITS PROBLEMS,” he continued, slamming the table with his fingers like he was trying to murder a piano.
“The American one and ours more than most,” quipped Lucas.
“READ ARROW’S THEOREM PLEASE SOMEBODY!” Rhys-Davies howled at the moon.
Calm down, dear!
Watch here:
“Oh woman have you not read Kenneth Harrow” may be the stupidest sentence ever to follow someone slamming their fists on the table pic.twitter.com/Stuz4CLutP
— James Felton (@JimMFelton) April 26, 2019