Why my tortoise is better than Mourinho, and other lessons from the return of the Prem

Why on Earth did the Spurs board think Mourinho would do any better than Pochettino?

LONDON, ENGLAND - JULY 06: Jose Mourinho, Manager of Tottenham Hotspur gives his team instructions during the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and Everton FC at Tottenham Hotspur Stadium on July 06, 2020 in London, England. Football Stadiums around Europe remain empty due to the Coronavirus Pandemic as Government social distancing laws prohibit fans inside venues resulting in all fixtures being played behind closed doors. (Photo by Adam Davy/Pool via Getty Images)

Time for a rundown of things we have learned since the Restart started…

We now know that Mourinho really was a mistake for Spurs. He was making a right mess of it before lockdown, but he had serious injuries to Kane and Son to justify poor performances. With all his so-called stars fit, he is being revealed for what he has become – a loser. Why on Earth did the Spurs board think he would do any better than Pochettino? Chucked out at Chelsea, a failure at Man Utd, far too keen on doing advertising, his glory days are so long in the past only he remembers them. Before being stuffed by Sheffield United, he moaned that having a whole week between games was not fair. Give me strength.