Those Tory vultures who deludedly believe that the public won’t mind if the BBC is dismantled would do well to scan the Christmas schedules, a cursory glance at which reveals that, this year, it practically owns the holidays. While ITV pathetically waves the lonely Lady Edith at us (Downton Abbey, Christmas Day, 8.45pm) – “Will she marry at last?” it quavers desperately, reeking of Yardley – BBC1 provides crowd-pleaser after crowd-pleaser: Doctor Who (Christmas Day, 5.15pm), Call the Midwife (also Christmas Day, 7.30pm), Sherlock (New Year’s Day, 9pm), and on and on. It’s a bit embarrassing. Think, for a moment, of the two channels as parents. Here is ITV, hurriedly shoving a few satsumas and a crummy old Pez dispenser in an ancient stocking. And here is the BBC, frantically wrapping all the luxuriant booty it picked up when it splurged at Hamleys months ago.
Let’s begin with the BBC. Beyond the return of the above, its main offering is Dickensian, Tony Jordan’s extraordinary Dickens mash-up (BBC1, begins on Boxing Day, 7pm). I first heard about this crazed project last September, at a literary festival, from Robert Douglas-Fairhurst, who advised on it (a professor of English at Oxford, he is the author of the brilliant Becoming Dickens). All I can tell you is that, as he spoke, there was wonder in his eyes. Jordan, once the lead writer on EastEnders, has plucked various Dickens characters from their own stories and put them to work in his, a soapy 20-part drama (each episode is 30 minutes long). Will it come off? Who knows? Andrew Davies had great success when he chopped Bleak House into half-hour slices and Jordan’s cast is great (Anton Lesser as Fagin, Stephen Rea as Inspector Bucket, Pauline Collins as Mrs Gamp). On the other hand, it seems risky at best and downright stupid at worst to mess with the great, immortal Boz. Which isn’t to say that I won’t be watching, because I will.
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