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24 August 2022

This England: You’re stuffed

This column – which, though named after a line in Shakespeare’s “Richard II”, refers to the whole of Britain – has run in the NS since 1934.

By New Statesman

A teenager on the run from the law was found hiding inside a giant teddy bear. Joshua Dobson, 18, was wanted by Greater Manchester Police (GMP) for the theft of a car and petrol.

Officers heard breathing during a house search and found him inside the toy. “He’s now stuffed behind bars,” GMP said on Facebook after Dobson was sent to prison for 32 weeks.

“Apprehended by officers on paw patrol,” one person wrote. “He’ll get the bear essentials,” another added.
Metro (Amanda Welles)

Not my cup of tea

NHS bosses caused uproar when they handed midwives and nurses a single teabag with the message: “A little treat to say thank you.”

Furious staff posted messages including: “Wow, a 2p gift. But you can’t get a break to use it. What an insult.”

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THANK YOU

Another wrote : “Even worse considering it costs £300 to boil a kettle at the moment.”

Worcestershire Acute Hospitals NHS trust said: “It’s a shame one small act of kindness has been taken out of context.”
Metro (Daragh Brady)

Long-lost loos

Railway station toilets last used three decades ago have been renovated and reopened.

Network Rail said the men’s toilets at Bristol Temple Meads were last open in the early 1990s before being sealed during building work. They were rediscovered in 2019 and have been converted into a facility for women.
Evening Standard (Glynn Haggett)

[See also: An ode to the Great British music festival]

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This article appears in the 24 Aug 2022 issue of the New Statesman, The Inflation Wars