Wikileaks was the future once. Then it became Julian Assange

LONDON, ENGLAND - APRIL 11: Julian Assange gestures to the media from a police vehicle on his arrival at Westminster Magistrates court on April 11, 2019 in London, England. After weeks of speculation Wikileaks founder Julian Assange was arrested by Scotland Yard Police Officers inside the Ecuadorian Embassy in Central London this morning. Ecuador's President, Lenin Moreno, withdrew Assange's Asylum after seven years citing repeated violations to international conventions. (Photo by Jack Taylor/Getty Images)

O frabjous day! We are all bored out of our minds with Brexit when a demented looking gnome is pulled out of the Ecuadorian embassy by the secret police of the deep state. Or “the met” as normal people call them.

Julian Assange – freedom fighter extraordinaire, friend of Pamela Anderson and Vivienne Westwood, Steve Bannon and Nigel Farage, cat neglecter, anti -feminist, criminal mastermind, founder of Wikileaks – has been holed up in the Ecuadorian embassy for years.