If you turn on any political talk show and see that the majority of or – clincher – all the guests are female, it’s a safe bet that some peer, member of parliament, or senior government official has been caught attempting to run his hands over lady-areas without obtaining the owner’s consent again.
I always feel a little bit sorry for the women MPs who turn up on the swiftly-assembled Sofa of Tears in the aftermath of these scandals. Not because such behaviour isn’t totally inappropriate and shouldn’t be decried, but because I imagine they’re all thinking, “Yeah, I chair my own committee and know my Early Day Motion from my Presentation Bill, but the only time you want me to talk about matters that pass within a postcode of politics is when some entitled wankspangle has been caught doing a Rolf outside the tearoom, and you want to nod along sympathetically at my tenderly expressed feelings on the issue. Actual politics? That’s reserved for the men.”
Within this context, Harriet Harman raising the issue of sexism in parliament provided many opportunities to both listen to the lady-feels, and to inform the ladies what they should be feeling. If you’re a female MP being asked about sexism in parliament on the Sofa of Tears, it’s always best to imply vaguely that you understand that this sort of thing has happened to someone else and it’s absolutely disgraceful, but you always like to file it under Worse Things Happen At Sea, lest you appear weak or, a worse, “One of Those Women.”
Harriet definitely went into “One of Those Women” territory on Tuesday as a result of her speech on sexism in parliament.
She made some valid points. Any male MP who reports a fellow comrade to the Serjeant at Arms for the crime of “Possibly being in possession of a baby in the division lobby” needs to take a long, hard look at themselves. I mean, really: you were there at the conception of your own children, one assumes, do you really find what happens after the birth mildly revolting?
And she made some points that weren’t so valid. For example, just as the Emperor Tiberius got shot of anyone around him who may have conceivably had a claim to be Caesar, so the famously cautious Gordon Brown was unlikely to confer on whoever won a Labour party election the title “Deputy Prime Minister.” Especially as – awkward – the Gord was elected unopposed, and didn’t fight an election for his role within the Labour party like Harman had to. It sounds less like misogyny that it does normal, run-of-the-mill politics.
In addition, it was not the worst injustice since Bobby Sands when Harman was invited to a dinner for “Top Important Women” at the London G20 only to discover – the HORROR – that the wives of other G20 leaders were there as well. For a politician of Harman’s pedigree, I can understand how it must have rankled to be seated with the WAGs, but at the same time, I can also understand how the event was probably the end result of some well-meaning soul attempting to feminist-up the gathering so that the prime ministerial residence didn’t resemble a Tupperware party in Stepford. Arguably, the mastermind got it slightly wrong, but that doesn’t mean that the intention was either malign or malicious.
Fundamentally, nonetheless, the entire storm has put me in the unfortunate position of having to agree – at least in part – with Harriet Harman.
Thanks a bunch, the patriarchy.
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