It is with a heavy heart that I must announce Nigel Farage is at it again.
The on-again, off-again Ukip leader and current Member of the European Parliament has appeared at a Donald Trump rally to lend his support to the presidential candidate.
It was, predictably, distressing.
Farage started by telling his American audience why they, like he, should be positive.
“I come to you from the United Kingdom” –
Okay, good start. Undeniably true.
“– with a message of hope –”
Again, probably quite true.
Image: Clearly hopeful (Wikipedia Screenshot)
– and optimism.”
Ah.
Image: Nigel Farage in front of a poster showing immigrants who are definitely not European (Getty)
He continues: “If the little people, if the real people–”
Wait, what?
Why is Trump nodding sagely at this?
The little people?
Image: It’s a plane with the name Trump on it (Wikimedia Commons)
THE LITTLE PEOPLE?
Image: It’s the word Trump on the side of a skyscraper I can’t cope with this (Pixel)
THE ONLY LITTLE PERSON CLOSE TO TRUMP IS RIDING A MASSIVE STUFFED LION
Image: I don’t even know what to tell you. It’s Trump and his wife and a child riding a stuffed lion.
IN A PENTHOUSE
A PENTHOUSE WHICH LOOKS LIKE LIBERACE WAS LET LOOSE WITH THE GILT ON DAY FIVE OF A PARTICULARLY BAD BENDER
Image: So much gold. Just gold, everywhere.
HIS WIFE HAS SO MANY BAGS SHE HAS TO EMPLOY A BAG MAN TO CARRY THEM
Image: I did not even know there were so many styles of Louis Vuitton, and my dentists has a lot of old copies of Vogue.
Anyway. Back to Farage, who is telling the little people that they can win “against the forces of global corporatism”.
Image: Aaaaarggghhhh (Wikipedia Screenshot)
Ugh. Okay. What next? Oh god, he’s telling them they can have a Brexit moment.
They will soon be calling me MR. BREXIT!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) August 18, 2016
“… you can beat Washington…”
It is time to bring competence to Washington. It is time get results. Let’s Make America Great Again! https://t.co/u25yI6aIvG
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) July 2, 2015
“… if enough decent people…”
26,000 unreported sexual assults in the military-only 238 convictions. What did these geniuses expect when they put men & women together?
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) May 7, 2013
“…are prepared to stand up against the establishment”
Image: A screenshot from Donald Trump’s Wikipedia page.
I think I need a lie down.
Watch the full clip here:
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